Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Positive Transparency.



There used to be a sense of trust and vulnerability when we were able to open up to others. There were days when difference of opinions were welcome to the conversation and nights ended with coffee and respect of the other. We used to open up our homes and front porches for play dates and dinners, and laughs about past times while dreaming of adventures to come. There was a time when judgement didn't come from our fingertips and canvased for others to see. There was privacy. When a child is born, a couple gets married, your neighbor became successful - there was community to celebrate with. These moments of happiness were shared and celebrated. Now they are just screen-shots and whispers. Nobody brings pie to their new neighbors anymore, getting welcomed to the neighborhood is  a past time, flags have to be taken down, prayer isn't allowed in school, our amendments are tarnished, our self-pride has been torn down, being too sensitive is now a crime and telling someone they are sensitive will soon be a hate-crime. And God forbid your are "different". We are not allowed to be transparent anymore. Where has positive transparency gone? Why has it all come down to the negatives?

When I first joined social media - I joined so I could be connected to others. I joined so I could be apart of a community that share like-minded ideas but where differences were accepted. I joined social media so I could share my ups and downs while having meaningful, friendly conversations.  

And Now, I can hardly way to be disconnected at the end of the day. I've realized how much I've stopped being transparent, because it's now a bad thing to be such. I have become a very closed off person with no desire to have conversations that are less than decent and meaningful. I tell SR all the time "I shouldn't have to be in a conversation that I don't agree with and I shouldn't have to be called names or beaten down because my opinions are different. So, I'm out." and he understands. Social Media has made it really hard for me to even be SOCIAL. I already have social anxiety and being around people is becoming more and more difficult every day. Online issues have poured into our every day lives. Twitter, Facebook, Instagram...these platforms that have become a watering hole of drama, a bed for tragedy to lay its head, a place to air out your personal dirty laundry, a table to sit at when you want to get in an argument, a mirror that you can't stop staring into after you've spent hours of looking 87 weeks deep into a strangers perfectly filtered life. It's become a stage for you to stand on when you want your voice to be heard but only so you can argue that your monologue is the only one that matters.  It's a political firing squad & a religious tear down. It's a passive aggressive click of a button. It's a filter. It's a hallmark christmas card perfectly designed to show the story book version of your life. It's a place for blame and judgement. It's a place to be social but only in a screen-shot sent to your best friend, venting session kind of way. It's news clips and rallies. It's just become predictable. It's become exhausting. 

I wish we could say that social media will get better - but the truth is, It won't get better until WE get better. So Log off, delete the arguments, listen with the intent to listen rather than with the intent to respond, be open to others opinions and respect them when it's not the same as yours. Take off the filters, celebrate what matters, Pray More, Worry Less. Be kind to others. Put your phones down and be transparent with the world around you.

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