Tuesday, November 13, 2018

How To: Support Your Spouses Growth

I met my husband shortly after my 20th birthday. At a time where I was undeniably socially awkward towards the opposite sex and was trying to now navigate my way through the beginning of my twenties.

Twenty is a weird age, you've been legally an adult for 2 years now and yet you're not legal to drink alcohol. Twenty is when you are in college still deciding on your major and in limbo on what you want to do for the rest of your life. Twenty is seeing all your friends in relationships either with the same person they were dating in high school or with someone new they met in college. And then there you are, single, crying in your bedroom while reading twilight and wondering if an "Edward Cullen" really does exist. He doesn't by the way. Twenty is uncomfortable. Twenty is that Britney Spears song, you know, that one where she says "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman." - That one! 

My Husband is only one year older than me. But when we met, I felt like he had lived so much more life than I had. Let me state here that it took a solid 2 months for me to even speak in a full sentence to him. I was like that girl in those movies who would day-dream stare at their crush while unknowingly blocking his locker, and when the boy says "Excuse Me, Can you move?" the girl's reply doesn't even make sense at the moment, like "Thank You" - I was that girl. Awkward with poor communication skills. But there was my husband - friends with everyone, outgoing, talkative, confident. I was honestly confused why he kept interest in me when all I'd reply with is one or two words and never look him in the eye. But, 8 years later, here we are. Even when people said we were too different and too young. 

Over the years my darling husband has remained the same: Cool, calm, outgoing, driven and focused. He has always known who he is as a person and has never cared what people think of him. He marches to the beat of his own drum, something that I had always tempted to do but was also terrified of. I lacked confidence in every aspect of my life. I had no idea who I was. Everything that I had dreamed of seemed like some impossible far off reality. I've always held myself and my future to very high standards. And because of this, I settled. I was just a church-going, theater nerd, who would rather spend the weekend at home with her parents than going out to socialize. And when I did socialize, I just followed in the suit of the others around me. But year after year, something would change. We would make friends, lose friends, go here, go there. And by seeing all the things I didn't want to be, I began to find myself in different ways. I began to find it easier to love the things I was into even if they were different. I slowly began to come out of the shell I was hiding in and did the things I love to do even when they weren't the "norm" in my group. And the best part of these constant new discoveries of who I am - My Husband. Standing by my side, cheering me on and loving every version of myself. 

Support Each Other.
My Husband told me one of his favorite things about my ever-changing self is that it keeps him on his toes. I am not boring by any means. He will never know what he is walking into but he gladly does it because he knows it's something important to me. Just as he does for me, I get to know the things he loves; even when I had no idea that Koby Bryant and LeBron James were two different people. 

Pro Tip: Support the things your significant other is into even when you're clueless about it. 

Give Each Other Space.
Sometimes I just want to curl up and quietly read a book or slip into a Hallmark Christmas movie coma - without anyone bothering me. And sometimes my husband wants to stay late at the shop to work on his racecar or brew beer with his dad. Allow each other to have space to do the things that make them happy. Even when you're married, you are allowed to have something to yourself. 

Pro Tip: You grow better together when you allow each other to grow alone. 

Let them talk about their passions.
I am clueless about cars and yet my husband is very knowledgeable. So most of the time when he is talking about racing and all its terminology I have a blank stare on my face. But, I began asking questions about what (this) part does and why (that) part is needed. Sometimes the answer is confusing but I ask anyway because I love hearing my husband talk about things he is passionate about. 

Pro Tip: Make sure you can talk about your passions too even when it's super silly. 

Get involved. 
If your husband loves to race, like mine, jump in the truck and go to the track with him. Get Involved. If your wife likes talking about the moon and writing intentions like I do, sit down and learn about the moon with her. (My Husband is the best!) You don't have to dive deep into their passions as a whole, but get involved in some way - this is a confirmation to your spouse that they can be who they are and do what they love with your complete backing! 

Pro Tip: Your Marriage will be WAY stronger when you show interest and participate in what your spouse cares about.

Love Each Other.
At the end of the day - Love each other. Regardless of any quirks, mishaps, loud personalities, ever-changing hobbies...Love Each other. Supporting each other through personal growth is going to strengthen your marriage. It's saying "I Love You even when." It is giving your loved one the space to be themselves while also being a wife/ husband/ mom/ dad. 

We don't need to lose ourselves when we get married. I truly believe I didn't find myself until I got married. And No, not because I "found myself in a man," but because I married someone who supported my want for growth.  My Husband is my biggest supporter when it comes to me exploring and discovering who I am, my interests, the dreams. He has created a space in our marriage that is safe and welcoming. We are allowed to be just who we are with no judgment or question. We grow alone and we grow together - just as it should be. When we are able to grow alone that is when we come and grow together, stronger in the best of ways. I'm forever grateful that I get to grow beside my husband. 

TWITTER: @ashleefelkner | INSTAGRAM: @ash_felkner

Tuesday, November 6, 2018

November: New Moon in Scorpio 2018

New Moon in Scorpio
Wednesday November 7th
at 8:01am PST

We have once again made our way through the cycle of the moon, and we start again with a New Moon. Our Scorpio Sun is now in conjunction (joined together, aligned) with our Scorpio Moon where it will be for the next 2 days. When we align ourselves with the vibration of a New Moon, we align ourselves with opportunity for personal high vibration gain - a way for us to move forward and manifest what our deepest desires are from the Intentions we set.

The last time we were under a New Moon, we were in the sign of Libra who is all about harmony, peace, and balance. Our Libra New Moon wanted us to dive into our relationships, with self and with those around us. We reevaluated what energy we wanted to bring into our relationships, keep in our relationships, and let go in our relationships. And then we set our intentions. We then met with a  Full Moon in Taurus, October 24th; which was all about releasing attachments and those attachments that hinder our growth and transformation. 

Before you dive into this New Moon, just remember that this is not a Moon of release. Just as Scorpio is, the new moon in a Moon of Transformation. This is the time to be vulnerable with ourselves and to really open ourselves up to the new beginnings that we desire. The moon being hidden is a great time to look up to the stars for guidance, they will set a cosmic alignment for the next cycle of our lives. 

When Scorpio comes into a New Moon, we have a powerful and mysical moon.  This being the best time to tap into our power and release our magic into the world. All of our best qualities and true energies are reveiled which give our innerself the chance to let the Goddess within shine. Scorpio is a warrior whose connection with the spiritual realm runs deep. She transforms through the art of magic. Within this New Moon really look at what your magic is, dig into your connection with the divine and release all that makes you..You! The New Moon is perfect for setting the intention of being Open to Receiving. By allowing ourselves to be open to recieving guidence from cosmic influences and our intuition, we can better understand the depths of our soul and all her wishes. 
Our passionate Scorpio is ruled by Pluto, the planet of death and rebirth. Pluto, although often misunderstood, is a great planet to work with in times of transformation. Pluto is a great listner and pushes us towards the big changes he brings. When Pluto is working with the moon, he wants you to live in your emotions; explore the depths of your psyche and come up with new understandings of things. Pluto also reminds us that it's okay to take a step back when you are feeling overwhelmed and undertake compassion instead of anxiety.

Take time this New Moon look at what makes you anxious - our true and sometimes painful fears that we have locked away in the back of our minds. Remember though, this isn't the time to release them - rather the time to use our capabilities to transform them into something different. Use your deepest fears as steping stones on your path rather then heavy bolders holding you back. When we take away our anxieties power over us, we are able to rise into our personal magic and ground outselves in each moment with complete trust. When we do this - we really see our world shift and align itself with a lightened path.

When in a New Moon...
* Be Kind to Yourself.
* Open your mind, body, and soul to recieving.
* Remember to Breathe.
* Focus on your deepest and wildest dreams.
* Declutter Your Space & Make Room for anew.
* Express Your Graditude.
* Trust Your Intuition.
* Be in the Moment.
* Write it all Down & Sign Your Name.

Lets all have a powerful New Moon in Scorpio. One that transforms us into the powerful beings that we are with intentions so strong that we have no choice but to work with the Universal Energy to Manifest them into our realities!

Love Yourself and Love Other People.

Twitter: @ashleefelkner | Instagram: @ash_felkner

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

Full Moon in Taurus (Scorpio Sun)

Good Morning, Full Moon. 
As we look back to the Famers Almanac, we see that the name of this particular moon is "The Hunters Moon," a time after harvest when hunting summer-fattened deer and prey are at their highest. 

In the early hours of yesterday, we moved into the season of the Scorpio; just as we are adjusting to this change from Libra to Scorpio, we are met quickly with our Full Moon in Taurus. Can you feel the burning energy between these two signs? I can. 

A Full Moon occurs when the Sun and Moon are in Opposition. The Full Moon provides a magnitude of Energy and celebrates Our Highest Vibration. Just as we've set intentions with the New Moon, we use the Full Moon to take action and begin to manifest our desired intentions. No Grit, No Pearl. The Full Moon is the time to tap into our inner voice, that voice in our head/heart/and soul that speaks only with dialogue that (we) you yourself can hear. Take this time to realign yourself with the vibrations that pull you closer to your purpose. As we release all lower vibrations, we are allowing new space for us to breathe into and create anew. (Rebirth). Just remember, the moon controls our emotions and when she is in Full, our emotions and feelings are kicked into high gear. Take the time for self-care on this moon and acknowledge inconvenient, sudden feelings that may arise. They are trying to tell you something. The Full Moon is not the time to continue in suppressing your feelings but rather pull them to the surface and deal with them head-on. 

Our Moon falls in the Zodiac of Taurus, our earthy bull. Taurus is represented by being our Feminine Fixed Earth Sign; which means the energy around Taurus is magnetic, practical, stable, and resistant to change. Like the Bull, we see strength, stubbornness, but the ability to be fierce yet gentle. Taurus is our sign that is most in-tune with our earth as they ground themselves into the earth to remain centered. She's there to remind us to keep things simple and return back to center (by grounding) when things get tough. Those born under a Taurus Moon tend to be drawn to the ideas with the ability to make sense of the world around you before you venture out. Taurus is Careful. On a Full Moon, Taurus is there to help us build safe barriers for ourselves, not to keep us from going out of our comfort zone like (Scorpio) but to have a place to come back to when we need to return to ourselves. (Grounding). Think of these barriers as resources, like the breadcrumbs Hanzel and Gretel laid for themselves. We can adventure out into the unknown but we will always have a way back home, to ourselves. 

Taurus is Ruled by Venus, our planet of love and pleasure. She is there to rule our highest capacity to express affection. As a Venus-Taurus, you are always affectionate but also reserved to give too much of your love away too quickly. 

On our Full Moon, Venus is currently in retrograde (moving backward). Venus is in opposition with the Taurus Moon today, where she sits in our Sun Sign of Scorpio. Venus in Scorpio has the tendency to be intense. So your, usually controlled emotions, may be out of line today and cause turmoil in your relationships if you aren't careful. Be Aware of wavering emotions, they will be heightened today. However, each sign has a Bright Side and a Shadow Side; or Yin and Yang. The Lowside of Taurus is Attachment. Taurus is super resistant to change, they like their comfort zones. Like a child to its mother, Taurus clings on to what makes it feel safe and what is familiar. With their stubborn nature, very rarely do they release their grip from people, places, and possessions. They like security. The Bright side of Taurus is the reminder that we can return to ourselves with peace of mind. So when things get rough, return back to center. During this Full Moon it is the perfect time to balance your high and low side out, push yourself out of security and release attachments you've been holding onto for too long; and then when you are ready, return back and ground yourself. 

How to Navigate Taurus Moon X Scorpio Sun?

Here is where our Full Moon appears to get tricky but is also very effective. We now have to work with a Taurus Moon (Rules 2nd House of Resources and Possessions) and a Scorpio Sun (Rules 8th House of Personal Growth and Transformation). These two signs are Polarities, which mean they sit on opposite sides of our Astrological Chart. Taurus is more materialistic, she likes to hold onto things as she is the sign of Prosperity and Money. She is our collector of possessions. Whereas, Scorpio, is the sign of legacies and shared wealth. The wealth of a Scorpio is more spiritual VS materialistic. Just as there is with Taurus, there are high and low sides of Scorpio - and when working against Taurus, all of these vibrations come to a head. The good news about Taurus-Scorpio is that both of these strong-willed signs are about living in the moment and being present. On the other hand, these signs are also terrified at losing what makes them feel secure. Taurus relies on all of her resources to get her through, whereas Scorpio relies on her intuition. 

Taurus is all about staying where you are, while Scorpio is about transformation and diving into the unknown. Although Scorpio is fiercely independent, her low side matches that of Taurus. Attachment. Scorpio is a perfectionist and she becomes obsessed with change and transformation, so much so that she doesn't allow herself to feel into her new self as she is always on the move. Be aware of this on the Full Moon. If you feel yourself shifting, let that shift happen slowly and breathe into what it's trying to tell you. We are like the Moon, always going through phases so that we may learn from each phase as we slowly pass through.

This Full Moon is a powerful one. We get two opportunities to dive into the unknown. Trust your intuition and be on the lookout for those little messages and signs around you. You are on the right path. We don't need to carry our security around like a blanket anymore, but rather step into ourselves and know that we can rely on ourselves to get us through. Our intuition is never wrong, and remaining grounded will always lead us into the right things. And so, although Taurus and Scorpio want to teach us things that are complete opposites, they are also there to help us grow. Get Up and Move this Full Moon. Get Uncomfortable and Step out of those Attachments, release them and renew. 

Happy Taurus Full Moon Everyone!
Love Yourself and Love other People!

Twitter: @ashleefelkner || Instagram: @ash_felkner

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Astrology Talk: Scorpio Season

Happy Birthday to all My Scorpio's. 
(October 23 - November 21)

We welcomed Scorpio Season in the early hours this morning and we said goodbye to our loving Libra. We have switched from our Masculine Cardinal Air sign (Libra) to the Feminine Fixed Water Sign of (Scorpio). 

Feminine (Duality) is Receptive and Magnetic. People and Things come to you with ease. 

Fixed (Quadruplicities) is the quality of your interactions. Fixed signs are resistant to change due to their perfectionist tendency.

Water (Triplicities) is the element in which symbolizes specific characteristics of a sign. Water signs are emotional and intuitive.

The symbol of our 8th Zodiac Sign, Scorpio, is represented by the Scorpion: a lethal, poisonous creature that can paralyze its prey with one sting from its tail. Thus creating this long living myth that Scorpios bring nothing but fear, hatred, and suffering. It's believed that the other zodiacs are intimidated by Scorpios, which is not the case. Scorpio is like a phoenix rising from the ashes with its ability to transform. Scorpio is also symbolized as a soft and tender inner being who guards itself with a shell and stinging energy.

Scorpio is a Warrior. She dives into the depths of her core and releases her power through the spiritual realm. She transforms through the art of Magic. She creates through her dominant desires. She is curious, imaginative, emotional, investigative, focused, and doesn't respond well to be interrupted while she is working. 

Scorpio is ruled by Pluto,♇ ,  the planet of death and rebirth. When we see Pluto in Scorpio this can be a very powerful time full of turmoil and revolution. (*I was born when Pluto was in Scorpio) Pluto is often very misunderstood as his energy is inexplicable and difficult to understand. Thus, it's important to look at here Pluto is on your horoscope. (Find it Here) Pay attention closely to where Pluto is for you as it will bring big change and transformation. If you have ever experienced or feel yourself experiencing a "whoa, where did that come from" moment - that is Pluto getting to work and changing everything up on you. It brings to light all the deep desires of your subconscious mind. and remember, Scorpio creates best through her desires. 

Scorpio is the Ruler of our 8th House: The House of Death and Regeneration. When Scorpio Sun meets with the 8th House, we see someone with deep insights.  When Pluto meets with Scorpio in our 8th house, we see a strong drive toward achievement and a very resourceful energy. 

Even though Scorpio and Pluto see both death and regeneration - do not fear my scorpions. Scorpios do not fear death, rather stand straight in the line of fire and take on anything that comes at it with a "You can't break me" energy. Scorpio is fearless and doesn't mind the chaos that surrounds her. 

The Keyword for describing Scorpio is Intense. This sometimes gets confused for Intimidating. Scorpio energy is fiercely independent, powerful, and passionate. They feel everything and dive into their emotions more than others. This is huge for those with their Moon in Scorpio, as the moon controls our emotions. Scorpios are truth seekers, they navigate through their intuition and instinct. They chase life, unafraid of what comes next as they welcome every experience good or bad. They embrace learning as they go as they are in unknown territory. As Scorpio-Suns, they find a way to embrace their inner magic and use it to expand their high vibrational body. They have a gladiator spirit and channel their energy into positive goals which bring them to their higher self. 

Due to their emotional body being so exposed, Scorpios often appear complex people who can't express how they feel without becoming closed off. Non-Scorpios may see you as over-controlling, too ambitious, conceited, and power-hungry because you like to express yourself loudly when you do. On the other hand, you are very likable due to your passionate and emotional abilities to listen, offer advice, and ability to be right when it comes to your hunches about people motivations and energies.

As we step into Scorpio Season, whether your a Scorpio or not, breathe into your intuition and spiritual side. Allow yourself to feel into your emotional body, each trigger, and suppression so that you may step out of your comfort zone find the power of transformation.  Many of us find it much easier to suppress our emotions and keep them hidden from our conscious mind so that we don't appear vulnerable and weak. This is the season to break down those walls of these preconditioned patterns. Use your emotions as magic to create higher vibration as your walk through this transformation. Accept your emotions as your own and don't let any tell you that your emotions aren't valid. If someone questions your magic and intuition, don't attack. A Scorpio loves knowledge, so meet these questions with knowledge. Questions with Questions until answers are met. When a Scorpio talks, people listen, but it's a Scoprios duty as a natural born leader to listen back.

Happy Scorpio Season.
Do what Scorpios do best and...

Love Yourself and Love Other People. 

Instagram: @ash_felkner | Twitter: @ashleefelkner